Curbing Our Tongues
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What do you think it means to curb your tongue?
In Ephesians 4:24, Paul writes that we have taken on a new self. We have been created in the likeness of God, in His true righteousness and holiness. He then adds:
25 Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another. 26 Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger… 29 Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear… 31 Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. 32 Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
There are a lot of things we are told not to do here. Let’s go through each of the verses:
Verse 25 –
Verse 26 –
Verse 29 –
Verse 31 –
Verse 32 –
Now, let’s go through each of these verses again. Where are areas that you see where you are struggling?
Why do you believe that you are struggling in these areas?
What are things you can do to hold yourself accountable in these areas?
Why We Speak Evil
Paul explained that there are a number of things that we need to change in the way that we speak and the things that we say. Why do you think things such as slander, gossip, wrath, malice, and other similar emotions and actions come out of our mouths?
Sometimes, we simply do not acknowledge how powerful our words are. Proverbs 18:21 tells us, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.” This is not hyperbole or an exaggeration. The truth is that the things that we say do have the power to bring life and death.
A brief search of the Internet provides numerous stories of people who took their lives because of hurtful things someone said about them. Often, those stories had some small measure of truth, but the slander and gossip grew. This literally led to death.
How do you think your words impact others?
What do you think Proverbs 18:21 means by “those who love it will eat its fruits?”
We Can Change Lives
The tongue is a powerful instrument. It can bring about great destruction. It can also bring about great joy. The Proverbs are filled with such examples.
Proverbs 15:1 – A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
Proverbs 12:18 – There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.
Proverbs 15:4 – A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.
What do these Proverbs tell us about how we can impact other people’s lives?
Why do you think that people have an easier time speaking hurtful words than they do speaking life and love?
Silence Is Bliss
One thing to keep in mind is that you do not always need to be speaking. In fact, keeping your mouth shut may be the very best thing to do. Proverbs 17:28 says, “Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent.” Closing your lips may be the most intelligent thing that you can do.
Are there situations recently where you would have been better off keeping your mouth shut?
God wants us to edify others. This means that we need to be cautious about the things that come out of our mouths. We should also keep in mind that we do not need to keep speaking gossip and slander about others. Proverbs 26:20 tells us, “For lack of wood the fire goes out, and where there is no whisperer, quarreling ceases.” Just like a fire goes out because it has no wood, gossip and slander will end when no one is talking.
One other verse we want you to keep in mind is Matthew 15:19, where Jesus said, “For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander.”
If you are struggling with the things coming out of your mouth, what do you think it is saying about your heart?
Your Memory Verse: Ephesians 4:29 – 29 Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.
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© 2025 Dr. Robert Pannier, Hope CDA, All Rights Reserved
